I grow tired of writing my thoughts

I grow tired of writing my thoughts… why do I? No gain to I receive. Few reply or give any hint to my existence. How many actually read what I write anymore? Wasting no time… straight to the point… the knife point buried deep inside. The point of the nails that rip my heart. The point I wish to make. The point of no return. The point of change. The point of sanity on the verge of insanity. The point when… you are submerged in life. When the waters of pain flow and the tide has rose… a wake splashes across your face… I again grow tired. I honestly wonder how someone would look at me… how you the reader reading this right now would. Everyone says I am so dark… and evil. I speak of helping people and how suicide is so wrong, and giving up and running is wrong also. I tell of how God is in my life. I harness the darkness only to express the pain that I feel and in a way which most can relate… and I am evil for this. “Blame everyone for something wrong with the world… and the world shall blame you.” Many have asked why I stop writing for so long… and most of my readers left with me… because I simply and honestly get tired of no response I apologize to the few that do reply. To the others that read anything I write at least say you read it… if you write then you honestly know what its like. If I read a poem I always leave some note about it. Good or bad. Call it a pet peeve if you will… you have a way to reply so do so… hey that makes sense if I read a poem ill at least give the author some idea of how to change the writing structure or the wording… and let that person know the if the grammar content or structure is appropriate to me… ya know irony kinda sux… after all of this I just remembered I failed English so many times its not funny 11th once and comp I two times… anyways help me out here along with all the other poets… reply give them an idea of what to do.